tsr.net.co and www.tenaliramareports.com
hi friends,
First of all our apologies for not updating this blogsite. The reason, as some of you may be aware is that most of our blogs were appearing on my new digital venture `The South Reports’, which as the name suggests is a citizen journalism website, focussed on issues that a south Indian living in any part of the world would be interested in.
The site has many wonderful writers writing for it. I would strongly recommend each one of you to sign up as a member of the site. The URL is www.tsr.net.co
The second venture that has just kicked off on September 1 is www.tenaliramareports.com. This is a satire website where a reporter called Tenali Rama writes witty and part fact-part fictional news reports on topical events.
I would request you to check it out as well.
Many thanks for your patronage and feedback.
Thanks
T S Sudhir and Uma Sudhir
DMK, the Dad, Moms and kin party
By T S Sudhir
If you are a DMK leader of any consequence, you will `land’ in trouble in Tamilnadu. The Jayalalithaa government is going after land grabbers with a vengeance and it is no surprise that a majority of them owe allegiance to the DMK. Karunanidhi is crying foul, accusing Amma of unleashing political vendetta. He has good reason to feel cornered. After `grabbing’ the land of Tamilnadu from him on May 13, now to accuse his partymen of grabbing land is a double whammy, isn’t it?
Wonder if Kalaignar feels inspired to write poetry these days. Because if he does, it will only reflect the agony and the pain he is going through in the sunset years of his political career. He has been giving expression to his outpouring of grief frequently though. Like when his darling daughter Kanimozhi was sent behind bars. Like when son Stalin was taken into preventive custody. Yes, you guessed it right. DMK for the patriarch is just an extension branch of his family tree. It could well stand for `Dad, Moms and Kin’.
In many senses, Karunanidhi brought it upon himself. By turning a blind eye to the power struggle within his different households, by postponing crucial decisions on the succession battle, feeling cocky after the 2009 Lok Sabha results, blatant corruption and muscle power and so on. Which is why when Raja’s 2G expedition brought the army of CBI to the DMK doorstep, Karunanidhi’s game was up. The DMK sunrise was no longer as stirring a cup as Nescafe Sunrise. But like the coffee, the election results delivered instant justice.
Where does the party go from here? By targetting police officers like Jaffer Sait, who was the eyes and ears of the DMK regime and key lieutenants of Azhagiri in south Tamilnadu, Jayalalithaa is tightening the screws smartly. Having learnt that voters do not appreciate highhanded behaviour, she is eschewing the temptation to do a 2001 midnight swoop on Karunanidhi kind of operation this time. The strategy clearly is to go after the key men who provide Azhagiri, Stalin and the Marans with the oxygen. Choke the air supply to make their hearts skip more than a beat, seems to be the gameplan.
JJ is still enjoying her honeymoon with the people of Tamilnadu. And what helps her crusade against land grabbers is that corruption is an issue is agitating the country and the DMK is seen as a party that particularly benefitted by charging itself with all its power.
My sense also is that JJ’s `Discharge Muthuvel Karunanidhi’ campaign may eventually help Stalin in the leadership race within the DMK. His elder brother Azhagiri, thanks to the company he keeps, is more likely to face the heat in Madurai and suburbs. With Kanimozhi and the Marans neutralised by the law of the land, Stalin has the space to make his political moves. His decision to lead the anti-government protests from the front, I believe, was the first of those. In days to come, Tamilnadu may see more of Stalin as he `grabs’ the baton from his indecisive father to pitch himself as JJ’s rival in years to come.
Officially at least, age is on Stalin’s side. Remember, even though he is a grandfather, the 58-year-old is still the DMK youth wing secretary ! He has been in politics long enough to know that impatience does not work. Amma could do to him what the late MGR did to Karunanidhi. The DMK warmed the opposition benches as long as MGR was alive. The challenge now is for Stalin to think out of the box. That will be key since he knows his rival is already in the ring to box him.
Saina says Namaste London
By Uma Sudhir
India’s badminton ace Saina Nehwal is raring to go at next week’s World Chamoionships in London. The event also holds larger significance because of the fact that the venue will also host the Olympics’ event in 2012.
Reddy `Republic of muscle power’
By Uma Sudhir in Bellary
The Reddy brothers are said to be the kingpins in the mining mafia that operated in Bellary. Here’s a special report from the ground on how the Reddy brothers allegedly use muscle power to control illegal mining.
It’s life as usual in Bellary
By Uma Sudhir in Bellary
A day after the Supreme Court ordered all mining in Bellary to stop for environmental reasons, an NDTV investigation finds that in this part of Karnataka, it’s business as usual. Trucks carry iron ore to steel plants; officials wave them through check-posts. A collaboration between government officials, politicians and mine-owners governs Bellary.
India plays fair, now for a lovely 2nd innings
By T S Sudhir
If it sounds an exaggeration, so be it. But to me, for the Trent Bridge crowd to boo the Indian team with chants of `cheats’ when they went to the pavilion for the tea break in the Nottingham Test, was a verbal version of Bodyline. This when one of their very own, Michael Vaseline Vaughan, had showed just a day before why the Brits are such cry babies. VVS Laxman with his receding hairline, would not have known that vaseline had such side advantages as well.
But first the run out controversy. By now everyone knows Ian Bell, sauntering back to the pavilion for tea (some cheeky Indians have called it Bell’s slutwalk) was given run out. You may argue that the ball was dead but then the third umpire did rule him out. The England captain and coach walked to the Indian dressing room at tea to request MSD to withdraw the appeal. `Mahatma’ Dhoni agreed, even though with that decision, he had kind of, also lost the match.
So what, his fans and admirers asked. Dhoni has won hearts, they argued. Fair enough. We may lose the number 1 ranking in Tests, but at least we will win the Fair play award. It can’t get more fair and lovely than that.
India has its back to the wall (actually it is back to the Wall, quite literally) in this Test but it is England, for who the bell tolls. Particularly after the uncouth manner in which Vaughan suggested that Laxman’s bat helped him escape from a faint edge. The decision was reviewed by England but rejected by the Hot-Spot technology.
“Has Vaseline on the outside edge saved the day for Laxman?” tweeted Vaughan. This after Stuart Broad had the temerity to walk up to Laxman and inspect the Hyderabadl’s bat. His mythological avatar would have chopped off Broad’s nose !
Sunil Gavaskar, India’s last word on all things cricket, pointed out that Vaughan had questioned Laxman’s integrity and that VVS should take the Brit to court. Realising the tweet was proving a touch too slippery, Vaughan let loose a barrage of tweets in his defence. Sample these :
“I think there has been a slight over reaction to Vaseline gate … Taken to court!!!?? Sense of humour required to many I think …”
“Just woke up to barrage of abuse from India … What are they going to be like when they lose this Test?”
Now that Vaughan is daring India to win, I would suggest Laxman lets his vaseline-free bat do the talking instead of his lawyer. And at the end of it, send Vaughan a bottle of vaseline, with compliments.
And as far as “sense of humour” is concerned, the next time an England team comes to India and complains of Delhi belly, the BCCI should send them DVDs of the Aamir Khan production to humour themselves in their hotel rooms. And tell them, S**T happens !
And for now, can we get back to Trent Bridge and win it or save it please? Can’t have the Boycotts of the world go Kaanv Kaanv about their team endlessly.
Karnataka’s tragic-comic hero
By T S Sudhir
Call him star struck or plain eccentric, B S Yeddyurappa took his obsession with Gods, stars and the almanac to a different level. All through his innings as chief minister of Karnataka, Yeddy interpreted the `God’s work is Government’s work’ line that is embossed at the entrance to the Vidhana Soudha in Bangalore, quite literally. One must give credit to his hardworking persona that despite praying regularly to the 330 million Gods in the Hindu pantheon, he found time to focus on the lands and mines of Karnataka as well.
Politicians usually consult astrologers on when to assume office. Yeddy looking heavenwards to choose the time of departure is an interesting first. Of course, he is not going anywhere. The powerful Lingayat leader will breathe down the neck of whoever succeeds him as chief minister, hoping to be a Deve Gowda to a J H Patel.
I remember covering the election results in Bangalore in May 2008 when the BJP just about scraped past the half-way mark. That Yeddyurappa will be CM was never in doubt but even on day one, no one was willing to give him a full five years in power. His short temper will do him in, was the refrain. I wonder if Yeddy knew that as well which is why he was in a hurry to make the most of his time in the CMO.
Yeddy is a family man. Just like all politicians in India are. If the Lokayukta’s exhaustive report is anything to go by, he allowed his DNA to mine-d its business, clearly believing in the dictum that the family that mines together, stays together in Mauritius on a vacation.
The mistake we are however, making is to go for Yeddyurappa’s jugular as if he is only Mr Unclean in public life today. There are many others in similar starched whites who have been molesting the system but have gotten away because they `manage’ better. Yes, an example must be made of the high and mighty brought to book but if the optimistic view is that a new man in Karnataka would clean the stables, it is living in a fool’s paradise. Governments today are run by vested corporate lobbies, who through their tentacles that run deep in the corridors of power and the media, control the levers of administration. In most states, the contractor-turned-politician and the goonda-turned-politician has learnt that a mid career switch into politics is the best way to guard against a midlife crisis with the law.
Coming back to Yeddy, the man has hogged the headlines for over two weeks now with his kabha haan kabha naa on his resignation. My humble plea is that the next time Yeddyurappa is given any post in the BJP or the government, the party should take an undated resignation letter from him in advance. The country will be glad to miss his Shakespearean `to go or not to go’ act.
Bellary Reddys flout SC mining order
By Uma Sudhir
Despite the Supreme Court order on Friday that all mining of iron-ore should be suspended in Bellary, the Reddy brothers, in blatant violation of the apex court’s directions, seem to be carrying out their mining operations.
A marital vow on Telangana
The marriage invitation card caught my attention because it was shaped like a map, the outline of which is becoming increasingly familiar. It was a loud political proclamation of a deep, heartfelt passion. On the red card was printed `laggam pilupu’, or marriage invitation, and the details inside were elaborated in a style of Telugu typically used by the people of Telangana.
So did you only invite people from Telangana, I asked him. No, I have many friends from Coastal and Rayalaseema and they all attended my wedding. This was only my way of showing where my heart lies.
So the menu at the marriage, for example, included “pachi pulusu”, along with the biryani. “Pachi pulusu” is a gravy made with tamarind pulp extract, typically made in Telangana.
I ask the groom, originally from Mahbubnagar district, where his bride hails from. Here only, madam, he replied shyly.
My colleagues from both sides of the divide in Andhra Pradesh thought the question need not be asked at all. In the sense that they opined, and strongly, that no longer can new marital relationships be forged between people from “here” and “there”. Arranged marriages are out of the question and love across this `divide’ or `border’ will not be easily accepted, one wise one proferred.
My driver tells us about a family in his neighbourhood. Two brothers married to girls from the two different regions of the state. What used to be light-hearted banter about how different and how similar they are in customs, habits and traditions has now become an everyday battle of one-upmanship on what should be cooked in the home and how. What should be celebrated and what should not be.
Particularly sensitive is the language issue. Renowned Tamil poet Subramanya Bharathi may have called it `Sundara Telugu’ or Beautiful Telugu. I recall a friend’s father has for years boasted to me about Telugu being the Italian of the East. And yet today, there is as no unanamity among the people who speak the language on which version should be considered `authentic’ . It has in fact become one of the most contentious points of debate. About whose Telugu is better.
Those from Telangana quite tired of their Telugu being dubbed inferior to that spoken in, say coastal region, are almost with a vengeance rightfully reclaiming and showing pride in the language that belongs to them. Who can deny the soul that the language can put into the music that springs from here, they ask.
In this era of heightened sensibilities and sensitivities, the first few words you speak are enough to label you. So it becomes tricky for people like us in the media. You will invariably be dubbed as being from one region or the other. Which happens very often. And if you deny, that is allowed to pass with a smile as though to mean that you must be from the “other side”. It is okay madam, they tell you, almost as though despite being from somewhere else, I am being given a concession of acceptance.
It was in the midst of this debate that I asked one of my colleagues who had been looking quite desperately for a tenant why he had refused many potential candidates. The otherwise mild-manner young man said firmly with a smile: “For the same reason. Because I cannot let out a portion of my home to someone from coastal Andhra when in the other portion, someone from Telangana is staying,” he explained.
“Every little quarrel has the potential of escalating into a full-fledged war. And it all begins with something as innocuous as getting water from the common tap outside to what you cook, what you celebrate and what you don’t, what language you speak and ultimately where you come from. That is how it has become,” he confessed.
Another colleague mentioned that in his apartments, some residents had recently wanted to do a `vanta varpu’ or a community cooking in the common area, responding to a call given by pro-Telangana groups asking people to come on to the roads and show that while they light the fire on the roads of Hyderabad to cook their meal, the heat should be felt in Delhi. They even invited others to join in the meal.
What could have been a fun activity to bring the community together however became a reason for even more sharp divisions. Those from non-Telangana regions raised strong and very vocal objections. Matters came to such a head that it was decided that those incharge of managing the association of house-owners should no longer be from either Telangana or the coastal-rayalaseema regions. So the mantle fell on someone from the region north of the Vindhyas !
Yeddy in no God’s land
By T S Sudhir
“Devare Illa, Devare Illa” screamed an agitated B S Yeddyurappa, storming into the BJP meeting. Finding the other leaders perplexed, he fished out a piece of paper from his pocket and read out in English “There is no God”.
“See, I told you na,” chuckled Sushma Swaraj to Nitin Gadkari. “I told you it means `there is no God’. I have not forgotten my Kannada learnt in Bellary. Dingi dingi jingalala.” (and raises her hands as if doing a jig).
“Sushma ji, Sushma ji, control, control. We already had a lot of answering to do for your shaking a leg at Rajghat,” Gadkari said, trying to calm her mercurial enthusiasm.
Meanwhile BSY was raving and ranting in fourth gear. “How many temples did I not go to, how many temple elephants have not blessed me. Not just temples in Karnataka but even in Kerala, Tamilnadu, Vaishno Devi. Even Mauritius. Yet, yet, I keep landing in trouble. And Gadkari saab, I don’t mean land as in my land trouble.”
“Shant ho jayiye, Yeddyurappa saheb. Please sit down. Someone get him a glass of water,” said Gadkari.
“During the emergency, I remember our leaders getting agitated like this,” started L K Advani. “There was this incident in Amritsar, I vividly recall, when hamare ek sahyogi par aarop laga tha …”
Gadkari interrupted. “Yes Advani ji, we have heard that story before. This is an emergency alright. But we can’t have you going in flashback into The Emergency everytime please. We have a very serious issue at hand. What should the party do? Our chief minister has turned an atheist.”
Venkaiah Naidu, a Rajya Sabha MP from Karnataka chipped in. “This is very bad PR for a Hindutva party like ours. Yeh hamare jaise Hindutva party ki chavvi ke liye bahut kharab hai. Idi manalanti Hindutva party ki chaala baadaakaramayina vishayam… ”
“Enough Venkaiah ji. This is not a press conference that you have to repeat the same soundbite in different languages to different channels. We have a problem on hand,” scolds Gadkari.
Prakash Javdekar tries to lighten the mood, playing court jester. “If Atal ji was here, he would have said “Yeh acchi baat nahi hai.”
“Javdekar ji. Yeh majaak ka waqt nahi hai. Yahan gambhir mudde par baatcheet ho rahi hai,” chided Advani. “I remember during a discussion in 1976 October, no, no, I think it was September, yes, yes, Raj Narain had made a similar frivolous remark and Morarji bhai had ticked him off.”
“Yes yes Advani ji. We will hold another session to listen to your tales from the Emergency. Promise. Pucca. Ok, double promise,” pleaded Gadkari. “What should BJP do?”
“Don’t resign,” opened up Arun Jaitley for the first time, even as Advani made a long face. “According to Article 87 part b annexure 6 (i) of Chapter 243 of the constitution, when the allegations levelled by a constitutional authority, like the Lokayukta, in this case, are leaked to the media before the final report is formally submitted, the elected leader is under no compulsion to resign.”
“Wah, Arun ji, kya Article hai. Wah. Very farsighted, B R Ambedkar was,” Gadkari was all appreciation. “So the leak has saved us.”
“But the problem is Yeddyurappa’s image, Nitin ji,” argued Venkaiah. “Just like during the Janata party rule, leaders objected to dual membership of Jan Sangh leaders like us, similarly, Yeddyurappa cannot be in the BJP and yet say there is no God.”
Advani nodded in approval at this reference to the 1970s.
“Yeddyurappa, you cannot abandon God,” warned Gadkari.
“What nonsense,” snapped BSY. “Wasn’t it you who told me not to accept that Gowda’s son’s challenge at Lord Manjunatha temple? I would have finished his story then and there. He would have never risen like a phenyl from the ashes.”
“Phoenix, Sir, phoenix, not phenyl,” whispers one of Yeddy’s aides.
“Ok ok now since both you and Kumaraswamy have been named by Hegde, why don’t you both go together and take an oath at the temple that you will fight all forces together,” suggested Javdekar, inviting dirty looks from everyone.
Suddenly, loud noises are heard outside.
Sushma peers through the curtain and says “It is the Bellary Reddy gang. They are holding up banners saying `Bellary Party’. Looks like they have quit BJP to float Bellary party.”
“Oh Dushta, dushta, Bellary party means BP. They want my BP to shoot up,” cries Yeddy. “Devare Illa, Devare Illa.”
(In a statement, the BJP has denied that any such meeting took place at the party office)
